rta_mostyn ([info]rta_mostyn) wrote,
@ 2009-07-06 22:44:00
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Excerpt from the experimental notebooks
- Need improved glue. Currently available supply of glue is doing a terrible of sticking turtles to one another. Must examine the formula, upgrade as appropriate.
- May need a replacement turtle.

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[info]taleyn_rta
2009-07-07 12:58 pm UTC (link)
Taleyn winces as Mostyn prepares to market Turtle Glue, which is wrong on so many levels not even a Galvanic Computational Turing Device will be able to calculate them all.

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 03:02 pm UTC (link)
Just think of all the marvelous turtle-stacking uses for such a thing!

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[info]addison_rta
2009-07-07 01:12 pm UTC (link)
What did you do to those poor turtles?

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 03:02 pm UTC (link)
Nothing!

Much.

Yet.

To most of them.

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[info]addison_rta
2009-07-07 04:35 pm UTC (link)
Do I need to send you more turtles? Because they're not very expensive.

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 04:44 pm UTC (link)
Perhaps another turtle or two would not go amiss. But first I should see if I can salvage the existing precariously natured turtle. I would hate to be responsible for inefficient turtle experimentation.

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[info]addison_rta
2009-07-07 05:42 pm UTC (link)
I keep sending you turtles even though I know you will do horrible, terrible things to those poor turtles.

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 05:58 pm UTC (link)
I do not do horrible things to them!

I do SCIENCE to them.

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[info]glanworth_rta
2009-07-07 06:20 pm UTC (link)
Science is never horrible!

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 06:21 pm UTC (link)
Exactly my point!

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[info]benedict_rta
2009-07-07 06:56 pm UTC (link)
In the same way that a ...
Oh, sod it. You know what I mean. Tools are only horrible if they are bad tools.

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 06:57 pm UTC (link)
Precisely! Why, one could do horrible things with an eggbeater, but an eggbeater itself is only horrible if it is bad at beating eggs.

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[info]benedict_rta
2009-07-07 07:28 pm UTC (link)
A bad hollandaise sauce on my breakfast eggs can send me into a fury that outlasts an entire city.

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 07:38 pm UTC (link)
I have acquired the impression that when you are in a fury induced by inferior breakfast products, many things might outlast an entire city nearby, including the lifespans of fruit flies residing at a sufficiently distant location.

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[info]benedict_rta
2009-07-07 08:01 pm UTC (link)
It rather depends on whether I also lack a crossword to placate me.

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 08:07 pm UTC (link)
(Note to self: Prepare several defensive crossword puzzles beforehand if there is ever sudden need to serve an egg-based breakfast to a Prince of Amber.)

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[info]bldy_cute_molly
2009-07-07 03:28 pm UTC (link)
Have you been lashing the turtles together with rope or twine (depending upon turtle sizing and tensioning/strength ratios, and calculating, of course, for multi-angle shear and compond forces) until the glue sets completely?

Are you sure it was Turtle Glue and not Turtle Wax?

Have you looked under everything for the missing one and set out some TerrapinTreats?


Edited at 2009-07-07 03:29 pm UTC

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 03:49 pm UTC (link)
Lashing! I have definitely neglected the lashing. I'll need to check on those ratios and calculate the appropriate rope needs before my next attempt.

I wouldn't call the turtle possibly in need of replacement..."missing"...exactly.

I don't suppose you know of any local doctors specializing in reptile treatment and rehabilitation, do you?

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[info]bldy_cute_molly
2009-07-07 04:09 pm UTC (link)
I can show you some good, strong knots perfect for lashing, if you need them!

Oh. Erm. Well, then. Not missing but less than optimally functional turtles tended to end up in the stew pots, where I come from.

I have so many random gluey turtle injury scenarios running through my head right now that I'm just going to enjoy them and not immediately ask exactly what you've been up to.

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[info]rta_mostyn
2009-07-07 04:14 pm UTC (link)
I should stop by and discuss knots and lashing with you! It's an area in which I could certainly use your help.

(...why does that sound slightly wrong?)

I am glad that you are enjoying the random gluey turtle injury scenario imaginings. Meanwhile, I must hunt down a good vet. Or possibly a good cook.

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